21 Days of Transformation: Day 12 – Decisions, Decisions, Decisions!

Let me take you back to a gorgeous, sunny, Sunday afternoon at The Black Horse Inn in Thurnham, near Maidstone in Kent...

It’s April 1986 and I’m sat outside in the beer garden. It’s an absolute scorcher of a day…

Picture, if you can, birds singing, small children happily running around…

A very typical English Sunday afternoon, if you like.

It just seemed like no one had a care in the world!

But looks can be deceiving, can’t they?

This was the time of day when I had to make that horrible decision…

Should I get back home to mark the two sets of books sat next to my TV, and to prepare my lessons for tomorrow?

Or should I stay for another pint of one of Kent’s finest real ales?

Previously, I’d always made the decision to go home and prepare for Monday’s lessons…

But this time, I went to the bar and ordered another round of drinks!

And, I have to say, it felt pretty good!

Tomorrow would take care of itself. I wasn’t sure how, but it would have to wouldn’t it?

That moment confirmed my decision to escape from the constant marking and lesson preparation that was involved in teaching. I’d been thinking about leaving for quite some time, but now the decision was made…

I’d be leaving teaching as soon as I could.

All I needed, was a plan, and since I’d looked at computer programming as a career when I was at university, that’s the direction I decided to explore.

And, 1 year later, after an extensive job search, I walked into my first job outside teaching.

The next 20 years saw me working in IT, as an Analyst Programmer, setting up my own Web Design business, Kaweb Ltd., Training as a Life Coach, and…

Getting divorced! (Something, by the way I definitely would not recommend!)

After a few years working my way up the career ladder, I decided to do my own thing and became an IT Contractor, working on various short-term contracts with major Blue-Chip companies in the UK.

The money was good, my work was pretty much 9 to 5, and I could cope with anything that was thrown at me!

But there was something missing.

There was no longer any challenge and no personal growth. And to be perfectly honest, I was getting bored with the job. Contracts in the main-frame market were also starting to dry up.

Time to move on again?

So, after a few discussions with a Alan, a very good friend of mine, we decided to set up a Web Design company… Kaweb Ltd. This certainly involved plenty of challenge…

Because neither of us had ever designed a website in our lives!

Talk about jumping in at the deep end!

But we had IT skills in abundance, so it couldn’t be that difficult… could it?

Well, to be perfectly honest, we coped well with the technical side of things, but we lacked business skills, so that was a rapid learning curve for us.

But we grew the business over a 5-year period, building up a decent client base.

However, my separation and divorce happened during the latter part of this period of my life. So this was a difficult time for me, and it took a lot out of me. More than I realised at the time…

I lost direction, I lost my motivation for work, and pretty much for life, too...

I needed to turn things round… and fast!

I wasn’t depressed, I knew that, but I was certainly down in the dumps for much of the time…

These were dark days for me...

It was during this time, with my marriage dying a slow death, that I went on a coaching weekend with the Coaching Academy.

Look, it was free, so it only cost me the price of a couple of nights in a hotel!

What did I have to lose?

As it happens, this was a major turning point in my life…

From that point on, I started to work on myself for the first time ever! I started to understand things about myself, I’d never even given a second thought to before!

All of my behaviours, my habits, my strengths and weaknesses started to make sense. I was starting to find clarity and direction…

But, I was strapped for cash…

Divorce had hit me hard and even though I took some money from selling Kaweb, I was still heavily in debt.

Supply teaching was one way to bring in some much needed cash, and even though this would never clear my debts, it was at least a start.

That eventually led to my first full term at Alderbrook, which gave me regular income for the first time in a few years.

I didn’t want to go back to teaching, but my mind wasn’t in the right place to do anything else at the time.

I desperately needed some money…

I needed to build my confidence…

And I needed to get back some meaning in my life.

So, when the opportunity came up I jumped at the chance to teach at Alderbrook for a term, to cover a teacher who was having a hip replacement.

That term was extended to another term and then to an additional year, and in all I stayed at Alderbrook for just over 8 years. 8 mostly very happy years, to be honest.

As a department, we were one of the most successful in the borough, but more importantly, I was part of a team that was so close-knit, I was able to get myself back on track in this funny old game called life!

Eventually, I put together a plan to set up my own business to coach kids, teachers and adults.

The problem was, how could I leave teaching, which provided me with a regular income and stability, without risking everything?

Time for another bold decision?

Well, the decision was made, and I followed through on my plan to leave teaching for the second time!

The rest, as they say, is history…

And also a story for another day!

21 days of Transformation: Day 13 - Forgiveness...